Writing is the Reward

“But I still encourage anyone who feels at all compelled to write to do so. I just try to warn people who hope to get published that publication is not all that it is cracked up to be. But writing is. Writing has so much to give, so much to teach, so many surprises. That thing you had to force yourself to do — the actual act of writing — turns out to be the best part. It’s like discovering that while you thought you needed the tea ceremony for the caffeine, what you really needed was the tea ceremony. The act of writing turns out to be its own reward.” - Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird

I have been writing for decades, although, despite the yearnings that I’ve had since high school, I have not managed to become a full-time writer. I might still consider myself an amateur writer except there was that one time when I was paid, just a bit, for one of my essays. (Thank you Mamalode!)

Still, I consider myself a writer at heart. And I’m treating my writing practice as my job now. Even if it doesn’t pay the bills.

Recently I led an extended workshop/book club focusing on Anne Lamott’s classic, Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life. It’s one I’ve read three times cover to cover, and still glean new nuggets with each new read through. Not only do Lamott’s words continue to hold universal and timeless wisdom, but with each new reading (about every six years) I find myself at a different phase in life, and so, her words speak to me differently.

The passage above especially strikes me now, re-reading it from the vantage point of a woman closer to 60 than 50, and in a transition phase, from a career as a full-time mom to whatever lies ahead for me. I’ve reached a point where it’s time to get serious about my life list: get things done, or deliberately remove them. How had I reached this point in life, wanting to become a writer for so long and publish something in the wider world, yet never having done it?

But wait — some gentle side of me reminds the other side of me that wants to guilt and berate — I have been writing, for a long time! A degree in journalism, an early career in public relations, a long stint in blogging, the occasional publication of a personal essay. I still haven’t written that book, and maybe that’s the mindset that needs shifting. My definition of being a writer is strongly tied to traditional publishing.

I remember a conversation I had with Husband years ago, after I discovered blogging and started building a community. I felt filled, and fulfilled.

“This is enough,” I reported to him with relief and joy, and perhaps even, a little surprise. The act of writing about topics which piqued my interest and curiosity (travel essays and historical nonfiction pieces), was a flow in itself, and as a result, its own reward, just exactly as Lamott points out.

Don’t get me wrong — I’m not against writing the next bestseller! I guess it’s just not my why in regards to my own writing life. I write, ultimately, because it lessens the yearnings, it helps me process the sadness, the griefs large and small, and, on the flip side of those emotions, writing helps me connect with and dig deeper into the wonders and beauty that the universe puts in my path (Italy! Art! Love! Nature!). Publication is not the only endgame of this endeavor, and I’m happy for the reminder that the value and the reward of this artform is often found simply in the craft itself.

Prompts

🤍 What’s your why, as it applies to your creative life? Why do you write? Why do you art? Take a moment to breathe, reflect, respond.

🤍 What does your writing practice look like right now, and what would you like your practice to look like? Write a bit about where you are, and where you would like to be. If your writing life is in a good flow (yay!), write about the factors contributing to this. If you’re not quite where you want to be, write about how to get there.

🤍 Time is finite and we can only do so much in a given day, week, month. What is not serving you right now, or what can you quit or pause to give your creative soul a greater presence?

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Welcome to Letters from Along the Way, where you’ll find personal essays and narrative nonfiction written from the heart about life’s beautiful ordinaries, and also, its imperfections.

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