Precious Days, and the Moment by Moment of it All
Welcome to May, and the debut of Soul + Spirit, a weekly column written from my heart to yours, meant to spark thought and creativity. This month has me thinking about Precious Days, and May’s columns are written for all looking to be more deliberate about savoring our days and truly connecting with the people who fill them. Specifically this month I write for moms of graduating high school seniors, as I stand alongside you on the cusp of this changing season.
“No matter how busy you are, don’t rush your encounters with co-workers, family and friends. Speak softly. Listen attentively. Act as if every conversation you have is the most important thing on your mind today. Look your children and your partner in the eyes when they talk to you. Stroke the cat, caress the dog. Lavish love on every living being you meet. See how different you feel at the end of the day.”
— Sarah Ban Breathnach, Simple Abundance
For moms of school-aged children, May can be hectic. We are equally catching our collective breath from school breaks and springtime holidays, and looking ahead to the rapidly approaching end of another school year.
It’s easy to get caught up in the doing, the list-making, the rush to check items off, often just to start over on the next new list.
Two-thirds of my three children are grown and on their own. But when we were all part of the same nest, May always brought, for me, a certain melancholy. An urgent reminder that soon enough, my kids would symbolically be another year older, and move a little further along on the path to their adulthoods. The mourning started tiny, just a twinge at the beginning of the month, but grew bit by bit as we progressed ever closer to month’s end. By June, when the kids actually released from school, thankfully I had made peace with this annual milestone and the first day of summer was a celebration: pizza party for lunch, at home, all of us in our jammies, together the whole day.
For parents of graduating high school seniors, May is a stopwatch. A countdown. A 31-day reminder that the clock is ticking. No matter what your child’s plans are following graduation — to stay home a bit longer, to leave the nest for work, school, or travel — certainly life will take a different shape for you all.
This year, I am again a mom of a graduating senior, as my youngest prepares to take her place in the world, on her own. Our days together feel more numbered than ever before. The tasks and to-dos and chores and work that crowd the days will always be close, keeping me company, but the child won’t. So Sarah Ban Breathnach’s words strike a particular chord.
Speak softly. Listen closely. Look people in the eye. Don’t rush your time together. These reminders feel like gentle hugs through words, encouraging us to take the extra moment to savor the here and now, to delight in the preciousness of every next day.
Journal Ideas
What does the phrase precious days mean to you? Is it a memory, a feeling, a tradition? Do precious days signify something ordinary and every day, or something more extraordinary? Write what it looks like to you, in your life.
At the end of a day spent in deliberate attention during interactions with others, write about what you notice, how it made you feel, and any specific observations that struck you. Did you sense a difference in yourself or in others? Share your reflections.
Think about a particularly precious day or moment you have had recently, or a certain memory from your past. What about this memory that you selected resonates most with you? How can you incorporate more of that into your right now?